Tag: authentic self

​The fundamental reasons we continue to love people we don’t trust…

​The fundamental reasons we continue to love people we don’t trust…

You can still  love somebody you don’t trust as you have your own approach in life,BUT it will probably make you examine  even trustworthy actions as suspect.(if you are not with some other kind of psychological problems that are based on emotional problems). I think this makes it difficult for  both people in a relationship –one suspicious sad/angry person and one  who feels wrongly accused.

 Everyone makes mistakes (that is the easy part!)  the harder part is  telling the truth and dealing with it, but when people do this,they get exhausted and take their hands off normally and usually…But even if they continue the relationship then..this is deep shallowness in their own personality. For me its emotional SI..means emotional self injury.The wounds are sometimes very deep.Self esteem totally shatters..and cos you cant take yourself out of that kind of self harm mental situation, you carry on..and falsely tell yourself as a belief that you love the person..but deeply inside you don’t..you just dont want to loose the one you got somehow,thats the only thing that makes you anxious and insecure…

Trust is the foundation of a relationship. The same as faith, hope and  belief. Without these, what type of a relationship does one have? They  can have faith, hope and believe things will get better by gaining the  trust they once had. Trust may take a long time to build but is not  impossible, depending on what caused the mistrust. However, if the  reliance isn’t earned, the one not able to trust is left with a mind in a  cage of doubt and the one not being trusted finds oneself constantly on  guard. The longer in the relationship of trust-less issues, the more  the poison spreads. 

Why would  anyone in his/her logical mind want to have a relationship with someone  he/she does not trust? That premise is totally illogical for rational beings.  The basis of  a respectful and loving relationship is trust. When a relationship is  based upon trust, there is a comfort within that relationship.  There is  a freedom for people to be their unique selves and their most  vulnerable selves. the person knows all that but fixes self into denial,unconsciously he is too logic tight that his illogical thinking seems correct to him..so he wont listen and follow any other neutral person..If there is no awareness regarding your mind and its states,how anyone can protect self… 

When a relationship is based and  built upon trust, each person has each other’s back.  If a relationship  is not based upon trust, the relationship is and will become problematic  in more ways than one.  If one cannot trust a person in a relationship,  what GOOD is the relationship.  If one elects to remain in such a toxic  relationship, sooner or later he/she will be proverbially stabbed in  the back and he knows that but..he actually waits for that to happen..  In other words, the more trusting partner will be left  holding the bag so to speak.

So,to sum up I would say,”Trust forms the very core of a strong relationship. Without trust, it’s  questionable how far a relationship would go. I really don’t think it’s  worth it unless trust is reestablished. Sometimes the heart wants to  believe and wants to make it work, even when you have that underlying  feeling that it’s probably not worth it. The best someone can hope for  is to give the relationship a couple of chances and if still there is no  trust forming, then probably let it go for good.” If there is no trust, a relationship will not thrive. So actually we cant love fully the person we don’t trust..this is our misunderstanding if we think that we still love the untrusted people as before,mistrusting occurred.

zaira khan

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Life is to create 

Life is to create something, something tangible. You start with little or nothing perhaps, but then you plan and assemble and…build. which I think is the best thing that we all have motivation for..  But we can get worn down from  the continual burden of having to ultimately be responsible for achieving our dreams or not. And some would say they can get dangerously too caught up in running their lives than living them. But most of all we have to arrange for the most part of our lives and you can get to the new conclusion about life.  Some are left too much of themselves out in the quest and have become too one-dimensional. In the worst situations, there may be resentment and regret that much of endeavor was ultimately for naught. So we have to keep balance and go towards the end of the world than to get back into life’s  previous, past events,  by not  being sure to include and make and face new ones.

Zairakhan

Giving up? 

 

Shutting yourself away doesn’t really improve the situation. At best, you will remain in stasis, and not get worse, but not get better. The best strategy I found is to strengthen your physical self. Treat your body as a container for your mental and emotional/spiritual self. If the container is stronger, your mental side will be better able to function as well. So to start – eat clean (no junk food, protein at every meal, and lots of green veg), sleep a full 8 -10 hours/night, and exercise 30 minutes/day. If you can do this, you will be significantly less depressed. Then on the mental side – find a hobby that you can develop yourself more with. It doesn’t have to be anything in particular other than you have a sincere interest in it. Find a group class that you can join, and that will start you in the #social direction. If you become more confident socially, you might be able to find some self satisfaction . If not, then at least you will have more friends, and possibly they might know someone and of course that’s you

Start from now and here you are important don’t de evaluate and exhaust yourself … good luck.

zairakhan

Self love or selfishness 

Sometimes when people hear the word “self-love” they associate it with the word “selfish,” but I’m here today to tell you that self-love is not selfish. Self-love is empowering and inspiring. It’s something we should all do every single day. Loving yourself doesn’t — and shouldn’t — take away from loving others, as being selfish does. Self-love allows you to embrace who you are and, as a result, be come better at loving not only yourself but others.

While self-love can be defined as an excess in self-pride, I prefer to think of it in terms of a feeling of self-respect and self-worth. I believe the more you respect yourself, the more you respect the world around you and the more likely you’ll be to live a positive life, therefore projecting positivity into the world. Of course, there will always be those that argue that self-love is narcissistic and that loving oneself too much is just plain selfish. 

Having respect for yourself leads you to have respect for others. Ever wonder why some people are so mean and judgmental? More often than not it’s because they don’t love themselves and are taking out the way they feel about themselves on others. If you want to live selflessly, loving yourself first is a great place to start because the more you learn to respect and love yourself, the more you will love and respect others, which, ultimately, makes the world a much better place.

Celebrating positive things about you supports a positive attitude about others. The more you value yourself and celebrate the good things about yourself, the more you will want to celebrate the goodness in others. When you are constantly looking down on yourself or focusing on the negative, it can be really difficult to find the positive in the world and in those around you. If you bring yourself up, you’ll be much happier — and more likely to bring others up as well.

Taking care of your happiness first leaves your heart open to caring for others. Putting yourself first might seem like the absolute wrong way to care about other people, but it’s the best step you can take to making sure those around you are at their happiest. Once your happiness is taken care of and you really learn to love yourself, you free up your emotional time and energy to love others and focus on them. Dwelling on self-doubt and self-hate significantly takes away from others so loving yourself is essential if you want to have the energy to care for other people in your life.

Believing in your own abilities allows you to pursue passions that can inspire others. Once you truly start believing in yourself and focusing on your positive qualities, you’ll be able to pursue your passions and spend time doing what you love. When you allow yourself to be who you are and follow your heart, you will be able to share your passion with the world. The more you believe in yourself, the more you will open up and share with others — and what you share just might be the very inspiration someone else needs.  

 Loving yourself makes you a happier, kinder, more positive person. The basic truth is this: if you love yourself, you be happier. When you are happier, you will be nicer and kinder and more open to others. You’ll be more loving and more willing to trust, enjoy, and celebrate other people. You’ll look for the good in yourself and in others and, as a result, you’ll have a better relationship with yourself and with the ones you love.
 
Though some might disagree, I firmly believe that loving yourself is an unselfish act because it leads to a more positive life for you — and the more positive your life is, the more positive you’ll be about the things and people around you. It’s easy to find excuses when it comes to doing something good for yourself. You can think of plenty of reasons why you should be doing something for someone else instead. But don’t let that little nagging voice in your head tell you that self-love isn’t worth it or its unobtainable. It’s possible for every single person to love him/herself, but it’s up to the individual to make it happen. If you aren’t already loving yourself and you have any doubts in your mind as to whether or not loving yourself is selfish, I hope this article has helped you realize that self-love is, in fact, an unselfish act.

Zaira Khan 

Authentic self 

Finding your truth and living an authentic life. It sounds hard, just by the sound of it. It sounds like a lot of soul searching and then rigid rules by which to live your life, almost. But the only truly hard part of this is the first step, and it is also the scariest part. And it doesn’t have to be about rigid rules or absolute truths, either.

There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting.

Zairakhan