Tag: avoidance

​Attraction vs. Avoidance

Some people are motivated more by doing things, whilst others are motivated more by avoiding things.

People who are driven towards doing things tend to have positive goals and seek to achieve specific things. They are forward-looking and see the world as being full of opportunity. They generally have a passion and desire to succeed in order to gain either specific rewards or general recognition.

They focus is largely on the future and when they have achieved something they may even forget about it in the headlong charge into further challenges.

Some people have problems with this in that they are attracted to too many things. They dart from one opportunity to another, seeking gratification all over the place. They may be looking for something and they may not yet know what they want.

Those who are driven to avoid things something look like they are attracted to the things they are actually doing, but they are actually looking more over their shoulder than in front of them. For example people who are very energetic at work may be driven more by a worry about failure or criticism than by an attraction towards achievement.

Those who are avoidance-driven focus more by their fears than their desires (which may well be fears in disguise).

Avoidance can be a high-stress preference. We may be generally driven by attraction when things are going well, but when we are threatened or otherwise experience high levels of stress, we may use an avoidance strategy to get away from that discomfort.

A problem with avoidance when compared to attraction is that there are many directions in which to run away from something, yet only one way you can run towards something. Motivating a person by triggering avoidance is not necessarily a helpful approach.

For those who are driven by attraction, seek their passions and lay opportunity in their path. They will swoop towards what you are offering.

For those driven by avoidance, point out the problems of the past and the dangers of the present. Show them a future where they can at least avoid the worst of the problems they face.

Zaira  Khan