Tag: feeling

Feeling OK 

We might feel that emotional regulation is about feeling okay. However, it is reasonable to assume that “feeling okay” is just the reward we get for listening to our emotions. My assumption is that emotions are there to motivate you to do the right thing. For instance, fear makes you run away from threats, love encourages you to invest in a (hopefully) beneficial relationship, and anger fuels your desire to protect your rights. From this perspective, emotions are the instant priority list of survival. Of course they can be far from flawless, but they most often encourage us to move in the right direction before we even realize that there is any such thing as a right direction.

Zairakhan

PC. Zairakhan 

Keep trying 

Life isn’t always fair… life is a beautiful chance given to human  beings to make the best of it, to LEARN and to provide others the best  of us. What can be unfair is the attitude and actions of human beings, but we learn from that. If we get hurt by something or someone, there is  always a lesson to get from it: To be stronger, to realize of the good  and bad, to take care of ourselves. The power is always within you , you  have all the strength and the capability to face any difficulty you may  be experiencing, with braveness and positivity, looking forward! You  were born to be happy :), you have unique talents, values, to provide  happiness to others. Loosing hopes is not the solution to difficulties  (no matter how desperate the situation might seem); it is a “coward”  response and a very selfish one, as it could cause so much pain to the  people who love you. Be positive, look forward. Whether it’s  self-preservation, basic human decency, or a combination of both, we  want to change that.

In some cases, we can. We are not powerless, and we don’t have to simply accept every injustice as an unavoidable part of life.
We do, however, need to accept that our response to perceived wrongs affects our ability to right them.
No one has a perfect life. Everyone is battling some kind of hardship.
It’s  also downright disturbing when people who really do have good lives,  overlook all the positives they do have going for them because they are  so focused on what they haven’t got, or what others have, that they  don’t. 
You can’t create positive change from a negative  mindset.  You have to heal your pain before you can set out to heal the  world. And you have to stop seeing yourself as a victim if you want to  access your personal power.
Studies have shown that the reward  centers of our brains activate when we recognize fairness—even when it  pertains to someone else. When we witness unfairness, it triggers our  amygdala, the primitive part of the brain that controls fear and anger.
You  also have to come to terms with the reality that even if you do what  you’re supposed to/ need to do, it still doesn’t always follow that  you’re gonna get what you want. Life doesn’t always work that way…it’s  not a meritocracy. People let their disappointment in how things turn  out get the better of them, often, instead of accepting it as something  that just happens, sometimes, despite best intentions. Accepting failure  and disappointment healthily is one of the hardest lessons to learn. I  still struggle with it, and hopefully will get better and better about  it as life goes on. 
This means that when we feel like we’ve been  treated unfairly, we go into “fight or flight” mode, with its resulting  sense of anxiety.
Psychologists suggest that when we fight for  fairness for others, it’s actually self-interest in disguise; meaning  we’ve recognized it provides us with some type of advantage to be fair.
No  matter how you slice it, we experience a strong, instant physical and  biological reaction to perceived injustices, and this can limit our  ability to think rationally and respond proactively. 
A little bit of unjustice in this life and enduring it can only make you  stronger; there’s always an island of love, happiness and joy ahead  even if you’ve got to swim a whole ocean of bitterness and injustice in  order to get there!
 “Life will always be unfair”; and that’s how this life will be if all  you do is keep swimming in circles in the ocean of mainstream human  mentality; it’s up to you to seek in your life those ‘islands of  tranquility’ which fill your emotion with confidence and strength; and  those islands are often in the truthful companionship of good friends and loved ones.  Growing older will lead you there, just be careful and don’t give up!
Make a clean corner in your thoughts so that hope finds a place in your heart and let instead bitterness move out.
Once  we mature as individuals it’s up to us to make life better, for our own  and for the future generations as well! Don’t give up!

Zaira khan 

Intuition 


Think of intuition as an unconscious associative process. Long dismissed as magical or beneath the dignity of science, intuition turns out to muster some fancy and fast mental operations. The best explanation psychologists now offer is that intuition is a mental matching game. The brain takes in a situation, does a very quick search of its files, and then finds its best analogue among the stored sprawl of memories and knowledge. Based on that analogy, you ascribe meaning to the situation in front of you.

Zaira Khan 

Screen of time 

Facing death means we are able to face the ultimate question of the meaning of life. In order to live we have to have the courage to walk through life realizing that our lives are nothing but a blip on the screen of time. 



Only Death,” Pablo Neruda”

There are cemeteries that are lonely,
graves full of bones that do not make a sound,
the heart moving through a tunnel,
in it darkness, darkness, darkness,
like a shipwreck we die going into ourselves,
as though we were drowning inside our hearts,
as though we lived falling out of the skin into the soul.

And there are corpses,
feet made of cold and sticky clay,
death is inside the bones,
like a barking where there are no dogs,
coming out from bells somewhere, from graves somewhere,
growing in the damp air like tears of rain.

Sometimes I see alone
coffins under sail,
embarking with the pale dead, with women that have dead hair,
with bakers who are as white as angels,
and pensive young girls married to notary publics,
caskets sailing up the vertical river of the dead,
the river of dark purple,
moving upstream with sails filled out by the sound of death,
filled by the sound of death which is silence.

Death arrives among all that sound
like a shoe with no foot in it, like a suit with no man in it,
comes and knocks, using a ring with no stone in it, with no
finger in it,
comes and shouts with no mouth, with no tongue, with no
throat.
Nevertheless its steps can be heard
and its clothing makes a hushed sound, like a tree.

I’m not sure, I understand only a little, I can hardly see,
but it seems to me that its singing has the color of damp violets,
of violets that are at home in the earth,
because the face of death is green,
and the look death gives is green,
with the penetrating dampness of a violet leaf
and the somber color of embittered winter.

But death also goes through the world dressed as a broom,
lapping the floor, looking for dead bodies,
death is inside the broom,
the broom is the tongue of death looking for corpses,
it is the needle of death looking for thread.

Death is inside the folding cots:
it spends its life sleeping on the slow mattresses,
in the black blankets, and suddenly breathes out:
it blows out a mournful sound that swells the sheets,
and the beds go sailing toward a port
where death is waiting, dressed like an admiral.

Zaira Khan 

Gut feeling 

There is no such thing as a purely logical decision. The brain uses a combination of logic and emotion when making decisions of any kind. That specific emotion, innate to us as humans, is intuition. We possess the capacity to feel, and thereby the ability to know things without consciously reasoning. The “gut feeling” is real, and we use it all the time.

Zaira Khan 

Time can’t destroy 

Friendship is a Golden Chain,

The links are friends so dear,

And like a rare and precious jewel

It’s treasured more each year…

It’s clasped together firmly

With a love that’s deep and true,

And it’s rich with happy memories

and fond recollections, too…

Time can’t destroy its beauty

For, as long as memory lives,

Years can’t erase the pleasure

That the joy of friendship gives…

For friendship is a priceless gift

That can’t be bought or sold,

But to have an understanding friend

Is worth far more than gold…

And the Golden Chain of Friendship

Is a strong and blessed tie

Binding kindred hearts together

As the years go passing by…

Zaira  khan

Positive emotions 

There are certain general practices that can make us happy. I as a psychologist believe that happiness is something that comes from within. 

I usually feel that  people who are thankful for what they have are better able to cope with stressful life events, they have more positive emotions, and are better able to reach their goals. The best way to harness the positive power of gratitude is to keep a gratitude journal or list, where you actively write down exactly what you’re grateful for each day. Doing so has been linked to happier moods, greater optimism and even better physical health. So try for once and always, and feel happy.
Though there are no direct to do things that can make us happy always and all the time but remember that your future depends largely on the thoughts you think today. So each moment of every day is an opportunity to turn your thinking around, thereby helping or hindering your ability to think and feel more positively in the very next moment. Always treat yourself with positive afirmative statements so that you know that you are in this world with some purposes and reasons.
Finally if you start learning to find happiness in small trivial routine things you will remarkably be different from other people, because the inner feeling will come out in your behavior and deeds.Start living a happy life with accurate self esteem, positive affirmations and gratitude. Then all the other positivism will run after you, for sure.

Zairakhan